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␍␍
STAR TREK TRIVIA QUIZ␍␍
␍␍
It's multiple choice, so feel free to make multiple choices.␍␍
␍␍
SCORE: 5 points for each question answered (correctly or incorrectly),␍␍
10 bonus points for reading the instructions.␍␍
␍␍
0-4: You're not trying!␍␍
5-9: Better luck next time!␍␍
10-14: Pretty good! I guess you've watched the show once!␍␍
15-19: Excellent!␍␍
20-infinity: Expert! Now you're ready for Wheel of Fortune!␍␍
␍␍
WARNING: There may be spoilers, but you won't be able to tell if I'm␍␍
just being facetious.␍␍
(Rats!! How do you type "^L" on a Macintosh?)␍␍
␍␍
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx␍␍
␍␍
(1) Tripoli is␍␍
(a) the ship that discovered Data␍␍
(b) a city with as many shores as Montezuma had halls␍␍
(c) Dolly Parton's bra cup size␍␍
(2) James T. Kirk is/was/will be␍␍
(a) in command of the Enterprise␍␍
(b) a real fun guy␍␍
(c) a real fungi␍␍
(3) When did Captain Picard surrender?␍␍
(a) The Captain never surrenders, you pig!␍␍
(b) That wimp surrenders every chance he gets!␍␍
(c) I thought Kirk was Captain!␍␍
(4) Identify the first ship named Enterprise.␍␍
(a) It was Capt. Kirk's ship, NCC-1701.␍␍
(b) No way, the aircraft carrier was eons before that!␍␍
(c) Wait, wasn't there some old wooden ship with that name?␍␍
(d) The only ship name I remember is "Galactica."␍␍
(5) Where is the alien origin of Mr. Spock?␍␍
(a) The planet Vulcan.␍␍
(b) The planet Epsilon Eridani 2.␍␍
(c) 'E's from America, mate!␍␍
(6) Leonard McCoy is␍␍
(a) a doctor, not an engineer!␍␍
(b) a doctor, not a brick layer!␍␍
(c) a doctor, not an escalator!␍␍
(d) sick and tired of your damn logic, Mr. Spock!␍␍
(7) Mr. Spock is␍␍
(a) the best first officer in the fleet␍␍
(b) a pointy-eared hobgoblin␍␍
(c) a Chinese who, as a child, caught his ears in an automatic␍␍
rice-picker␍␍
(8) Natasha Yar is␍␍
(a) dead, twice␍␍
(b) a crybaby chief of security␍␍
(c) Pavel Chekov's love child␍␍
(d) Boris Badenov's partner␍␍
(9) Deanna Troi is␍␍
(a) in great pain␍␍
(b) a great pain␍␍
(c) the face that launched a thousand starships␍␍
(d) She has a face, too?␍␍
(10) Lieutenant Uhura is␍␍
(a) Kirk's receptionist␍␍
(b) Kirk's secret lover␍␍
(c) the token black woman on the show, replacing the black guy in␍␍
the pilot␍␍
(d) smarter and better-looking than Troi, or at least not as much of␍␍
a nag␍␍
(11) Wesley Crusher is␍␍
(a) a brilliant young man who saved the Enterprise zillions of times␍␍
and deserves more respect (right, Mom?)␍␍
(b) a precocious child␍␍
(c) an obnoxious little twit␍␍
(d) Don't EVER mention that name to me again!␍␍
(12) A tribble is␍␍
(a) really cute and cuddly␍␍
(b) a pest␍␍
(c) delicious␍␍
(d) Wesley Crusher in his larval stage␍␍
(13) In "The Deadly Years," the Enterprise was in orbit around␍␍
(a) Gamma Hydra 3␍␍
(b) Gamma Hydra 4␍␍
(c) It doesn't matter, because Kirk's a better man now than you'll␍␍
ever be!␍␍
(14) Vulcans have sex␍␍
(a) never␍␍
(b) once every 10 years␍␍
(c) only when they go back in time, are under control of alien␍␍
orga(ni)sms, or on a spy mission␍␍
(d) telepathically, so you can't tell (watch the eyebrows)␍␍
(15) Klingons like␍␍
(a) red meat␍␍
(b) laxatives␍␍
(c) sex and violence, simultaneously␍␍
(d) growling and howling␍␍
(e) cute little boys␍␍
(16) Klingons hate␍␍
(a) diplomacy␍␍
(b) funerals␍␍
(c) dentists␍␍
(d) toupees␍␍
(17) Betazeds like␍␍
(a) nudity␍␍
(b) pain␍␍
(c) seducing Vulcans telepathically␍␍
(18) Androids like␍␍
(a) bad jokes␍␍
(b) petty bickering␍␍
(c) naked wiring␍␍
(19) Khan's full name is␍␍
(a) Genghis Khan␍␍
(b) Khan Noonian Singh␍␍
(c) Khan Noonian Soong␍␍
(d) Star Trek Khan '90␍␍
(20) A Romulan's personality can best be described as␍␍
(a) mean␍␍
(b) arrogant␍␍
(c) acting like he had Wesley for a son␍␍
(21) A Klingon's personality can best be described as␍␍
(a) honorable␍␍
(b) constipated␍␍
(c) acting like he had Wesley for a lover␍␍
(22) At maximum warp, how long would it take the Enterprise to reach␍␍
the edge of the Galaxy?␍␍
(a) They haven't even gotten to the Borg under their own power, ␍␍
so it must take centuries.␍␍
(b) They got there in the pilot, so it couldn't take more than an␍␍
episode.␍␍
(c) They haven't even figured out that the Galaxy is a lot thinner␍␍
in the direction perpendicular to its plane, so forget it!␍␍
(23) When the transporter creates a copy of a person down on a planet,␍␍
where does the original in the transporter chamber go?␍␍
(a) It's the same one, dummy! He gets transmitted 1 atom at a␍␍
time to save postage!␍␍
(b) He gets disintegrated, then reintegrated from pure energy␍␍
down on the planet. Transporter chiefs have the same␍␍
privileges as executioners, so they can disintegrate people␍␍
with impunity.␍␍
(c) The originals wind up on that same planet with all the lost pens␍␍
and socks. They are then used as extras in other series, or␍␍
become those doppelgangers from alternate universes.␍␍
(24) How can I get on an episode of Star Trek?␍␍
(a) Dress up as an alien at every Star Trek Con until you get␍␍
discovered.␍␍
(b) Send Gene threatening letters.␍␍
(c) Put yourself in suspended animation, and then just wait until␍␍
the 24th century!␍␍
(25) All answers to this quiz should be directed to␍␍
(a) /dev/null␍␍
(b) the Vulcan Science Academy␍␍
(c) Gene Roddenberry␍␍
(d) rec.arts.drwho␍␍