55 lines
3.1 KiB
Plaintext
55 lines
3.1 KiB
Plaintext
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File : SPH3.TXT
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Author : Bat Bastard
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BBS : The Banana Republic BBS
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About lunhtime, Lacey's thoughts turned to rice risotto. From she had heard
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, rice risotto was blow the backside off a concrete elephant, so it should
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suffice to do away with mummy. "But how do I get some Rice Risotto?",
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she whined."How do you get blotto?" erplied Tilly. "simple. Mix 3/4 of a
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bottle of Jeyes fluid with a quart of turps. and quaff. And make sure you stay
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downwind of me." "RICE RISOTTO!" squeaked Lacy. "Oh, that, " said Tilly
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"Killying someone , are you... o! of course, mater dearest.Well.....you'll
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have to steal it of course" Sometime Tilly wondered who wore the trousers in
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this family.
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Lacy made her way to the local shops. She stopped at the door. "Singhs
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greengrocery and meditation emporium" Looked promising. "Have you any Rice
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Risotoo?" she asked the swarthy looking gentleman at the counter, a man
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who, if the truth were to be known, used a thesaurus when oing crossword
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puzzles. "Ah, want to kill some one do you ?" replied the man, with a grin
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that would shame a appliance shop."No, he continue, but I got something
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better, its a new product line I'm trialling for Johnson & Johnson. Its called
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"Special, guarenteed to kill an elephant stone dead, true John, would I tell a
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lie to you, I mean this stuff is lethal, letahl/ Its so lethal it killed 6 men
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before we packaged it Rat poison'"
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'What, ' queried Lacy "Special, guarenteed to kill an elephant stone
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dead,lethal,lethal? its so lethal if killed 5 men before we packaged it rat
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poison.?" No, replied the man (who, Lacy noticed, had a perculiar species of
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fungus growing between his toes. She considerd calling David Attenborough, but
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thought the better of it)"Special guarenteed to kill an elephant stone dead,
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true John, would I tella lie to you.Lethal, lethal?its so lethal it killed 6
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men befor we packaged it rat poison".
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"I'll take it'" said lacy, with visions of swastikas in her eyes.
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"that'll be $3.50" said the man, who was begining to doubt the moral validity
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of the freemarket economy, and would, that afternoon, sell all his worldly
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chattels in an ttempt to follow his dream, to find the source of that
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sacred torrent, the leak in his upstairs bathroom.
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"Bugger of chocolate drop' Said Lacy, (who was a victim of overexposure to
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Scwartzenegger movies), and with a swift knee in the mans groin, she
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contraceptives, so it just goes to show, you should count you receive
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blessings like Jesus told us, not to mention ypour testies after starnge
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little girls have been in your shopk) , grabbed the aforementioned rat
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poison, and dashed intothe waiting world....
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******TO BE CONTINUED*****
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don't miss thenext exciting episode of .......
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SPHEROIDS, a tale for those with balls (and tits too for this is a non-sexist
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BBS)
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AUTHOR : Bat Bastard
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Brought to the WORLD by The Banana Republic BBS
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