54 lines
2.5 KiB
Plaintext
54 lines
2.5 KiB
Plaintext
REALLY USEFUL SOFTWARE IDEAS
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I know there's a ton of software out there wanting me to buy it, take it home
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and make a place in my day-to-day life for it. Trouble is, I can't find the
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time to sort all the software out. This country needs a software package
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designed to sort out the attributes of all other software packages and recommend
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the best--a kind of Consumer Reports software package. So maybe YOU can help me
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I've got a want list (below) and all you have to do is zip over to our National
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Satirist Feedback area and tell me what's hot in your closet.
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Here are some of the kinds of software I need:
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* Something to automatically dial radio station telephone numbers really fast
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when they have those 'be the fifth caller and win $100' contests. (The program
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should also scream incoherently when it wins.)
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* Software that not only balances my checkbook but also just goes on ahead and
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pays the bills and leaves me alone except, possibly, to ask for money.
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* Programs that not only teach and entertain kids but also tell them when to
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go to bed and take a bath.
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* Car diagnostic software which would allow you to tell it what that funny
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squeaking sound does to your nerves and then pinpoints the exact cause and an
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estimate of the cost to fix the problem. A really good program of this kind
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would also scream and complain to mechanics when they botch the job.
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* Household repair software that would explain why you shouldn't repair the
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roof this year.
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* Menu software that would avoid suggesting pot roast more than three times a
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month.
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* Software that explains software. I'm tired of reading documentation which
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only conveys the copyright and anti-piracy messages clearly. What we all need
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is some software that reads other software's documentation and then just tells
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us when to enter our name and address.
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* Home computer gardening software that is willing to dig in that gooey muck
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which was last year's failed garden.
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Are you getting the picture? All I really want to do is live my life.
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Software should be available to handle the details. Now, even though I have
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this really powerful computer, I still have to enter boring digits and piecemeal
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datums. It's all so mundane.
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I don't want a McIntosh. Sure, it thinks pretty well for itself but it sure
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doesn't think for ME. Come on, Jobs, get with it and start producing softwar
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that will do its own babysitting.
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And, perhaps, some moonlight babysitting for me, too.
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