77 lines
2.4 KiB
Plaintext
77 lines
2.4 KiB
Plaintext
From G.A.Roeves@newcastle.ac.uk Sun Jun 4 08:41:42 1989
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Subject: Divers Alarums
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The Programmer's Prayer
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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BEGIN
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{Main program: Calls procedures for Divine Saving Algorithm}
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REPEAT
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Our OS, who art in CPU, UNIX be thy name.
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Thy programs run, Thy syscalls done,
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In kernal as they are in user.
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Give us this time-slice our processor allocation,
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And forgive us our hacking,
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As we forgive those who hack against us.
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Lead us not into /dev,
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And deliver us from viruses:
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For thyne is the /root, the I*SQR(R),
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and the up-time.
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UNTIL FALSE;
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$logout
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I was thinking about the ``as much use as'' stuff too, and
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remembered the following -- which are similar:
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``Up and down like the Asyrian Empire''
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-- Monty Python, Life of Brian
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``Flat as a witch's tit''
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-- Austrailian Saying (used to describe beer)
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``About as comfortable as a member of the Animal Liberation Front at
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an owl stabbing party''
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-- (Punch Magazine, years ago)
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Hope these are of suitable ``quality''. Anyone else got any???
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----------------------------------------------------------------------
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...He [the Patrician of Ankh-Morpork] did of course sometimes have
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people horribly tortured to death, but this was considered to be
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perfectly acceptable behaviour for a civic ruler and generally
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approved of by the overwhelming majority of citizens. (The
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overwhelming majority of citizens being defined in this case, as
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everyone not currently hanging upside down over a scorpian pit.)...
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--Terry Pratchett, Sourcery
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----------------------------------------------------------------------
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And finally the rude joke...
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It isn't "rotted" so just skip over it if you are the sensitive type:
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A man walks into a jewlers, unzips his trousers, and places his tool
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upon the counter.
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The lady serving says, "I'm sorry sir, this is a clock shop, not a
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cock shop."
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"Well, put two hands on this," replies the man.
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+----------------------------------------------------------+
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| G R A H A M R O E V E S |
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| E-MAIL: G.A.Roeves@uk.ac.newcastle |
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+----------------------------------------------------------+
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