107 lines
7.2 KiB
Plaintext
107 lines
7.2 KiB
Plaintext
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= F.U.C.K. - Fucked Up College Kids - Born Jan. 24th, 1993 - F.U.C.K. =
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What's Black and White and BS all Over?
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Here's a thought: I was reading the personal ads last night and
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before I start, I should clear the air before judgment ensues. I do not
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read personal ads as a means to seek out the future Ms. S/DWF. We ALL read
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them. As much as we would all like to claim that we have NEVER seen part of
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an episode of Rolanda or even CONSIDERED buying a suit in Target because
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under good lighting it didn't look THAT @*#&! cheap, be honest: we look
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at car wrecks, we wish ill on our best friend just because they have better
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hair or skin, and we read personal ads. With that said.
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I do enjoy reading the ads for sociological reasons. I mean, how
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often to you get to look deep into the wants and needs of a person that you
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may have met at a bar and get see in black & white exactly how shallow their
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desires can be in five lines or less? In all of the time I have been
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conducting this research into the soulless husks of humanity, something new
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stood out. I've already noticed that there's the "I don't want to die alone"
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quality of ads from women over 38. On the other hand, to give something back
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to the older personal ad crowd, the ads from those over 40 were more honest
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and sounded more fun. At least if they do have kids, they're old enough to
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be out of the house and never call anyway. I noticed something about
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unusual about the "under 30 and ready to give up now" ads.
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Interestingly, it seems that the age of 25 is usually the youngest
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age of men that are sought by women between the ages of 18 and 35. Must
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have something to do with car insurance rates. The truly unusual aspect I
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noticed is that the descriptions of the author's looks and activities
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didn't make any sense to me. Most women and men described themselves as
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"good-looking", "attractive", "slender", etc. As well, they all seem to be
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into dancing, concerts, hiking, camping, clubs, etc. Now tell me if this
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makes any sense: If there are these "good-looking" people at clubs and
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hiking, why don't they meet anyone there? I mean, these are the folks who
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are out at the activities where they are more likely to meet people, and
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they are apparently "good looking" enough to attract at least the shallow
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and drunk, let alone real prospects. So no matter how hard I looked, I
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couldn't find many ads that had people who don't get out much and despise
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the outdoors. Wouldn't these be the people who need personal the most?
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As well, to point the finger in both directions, women are too
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picky and men are too shallow. Women will have NOTHING to do with a guy
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who drinks, smokes, and (god-forbid) plays games. Men want the dream-date
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(thanks again guys for adding to the myth that we ARE that stupid and vain):
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small, petite, attractive, athletic, and a whole batch of myriad physical
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qualities that made it seem like physiological profile of a sexy serial
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killer. Christ guys, why not be perfectly honest and throw in "easy",
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"enjoys one-night stands", and "must LOVE football".
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How do these people perceive the whole concept of these ads? Do
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they think that the perfect person has been stretched out on their living
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room floor with a highlight marker seeking them out? Do they expect that
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this god-send of a mate has been idly waiting and saving themselves for the
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day that their true love decided to spend 30 cents a line to fulfill their
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destiny together? In a world where the average 14 year-old is no longer
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saving themselves for MARRIAGE anymore, why in GOD'S NAME do we think our
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soul-mate is waiting for the three letter acronym of SWM before even
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dreaming that love could exist? Sheeesh!
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As well, I find that I couldn't respond to any of them. I either
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failed the "tall", "muscular", "nonsmoking", "fit", "active", "blond",
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"dancing and related activities", and "outdoorsy" requirements. That means
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that despite the fact I'm "reasonably attractive", "moderately fit",
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"non-active", "actively smoking", "people hating", "computer oriented", with
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a "stable, yet "Grapes of Wrath" salary-range profession", I can't reply.
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I want to see the honest ads. I want to read "average looks, I go
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outdoors only to get to my car, don't meet anyone because I'm to drunk at
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bars and work with married/engaged women, and just want to hang out with
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someone and not do a decathlon every weekend".
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Far as I'm concerned, most personal ads remind me of people who if
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they were granted 3 wishes they'd wish for a million wishes. Dumb asses.
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Capone
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<capone@dimensional.com>
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=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
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= Questions, Comments, Bitches, Ideas, Rants, Death Threats, etc etc... =
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= Internet : jericho@dimensional.com (Mail is welcomed) =
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= gote land +27.31.441115 =
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= Arrested Development +31.77.3547477 =
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= Global Chaos +61.2.681.2837 =
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= Chemical Persuasion 203.324.0894 Undrgrnd Indust/Inc. 207.490.2158 =
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= Damnation 212.861.0580 Damnation -Toll Free 888.803.8490 =
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= Hacker's Haven 303.516.9969 Unearthly Shadows 303.683.1443 =
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= E.L.F. (NUP) 314.272.3426 Misery 318.625.4532 =
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= Dungeon Sys. Inc. 410.263.2258 Psykodelik Images 407.834.4576 =
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= Paradise Lost 414.476.3181 Black SunShine 513.891.3465 =
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= underworld_1995.com 514.683.1894 Digital Fallout 516.378.6640 =
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= PSYCHOSiS 613.836.7211 Bad Trip 615.870.8805 =
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= Plan 9 716.881.3663 suicidal chaos 718.592.1083 =
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= Damaged 801.944.7353 The Death Star Bar 805.872.3151 =
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= Purple Hell 806.791.0747 BloodNet 901.872.8615 =
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= Atrocity Exhibition 905.796.3385 Phoenix Modernz 908.830.8265 =
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= The Keg 914.234.9674 that stupid place 215.985.0462 =
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=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
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= Files through Anon FTP FTP.DIMENSIONAL.COM/users/jericho/FUCK =
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= FTP.PRISM.NET/pub/users/mercuri/zines/fuck =
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= FTP.WINTERNET.COM/users/craigb/fuck =
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= FTP.GIGA.OR.AT/pub/hackers/zines/FUCK =
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= ETEXT.ARCHIVE.UMICH.EDU - /pub/Zines/FUCK =
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= FTP.DIMENSIONAL.COM - /users/rage/zines/fuck =
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= Files through WWW: http://www.dimensional.com/~jericho =
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= http://www.prism.net/zineworld/fuck/ =
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= (c) Copyright. All files copyright by the original author =
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