92 lines
5.7 KiB
Plaintext
92 lines
5.7 KiB
Plaintext
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= F.U.C.K. - Fucked Up College Kids - Born Jan. 24th, 1993 - F.U.C.K. =
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Random Thoughts
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Hmmm well just a quick but somewhat amusing/scary/interesting thought that
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just came to light recently. I've thought this before but it was just its
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reoccurance due to a specific situation that made me think about writing on
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it. To put it in a nutshell I've noticed that we humans need other humans to
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keep us safe from ourselves... To clarify: Those people that seems to spend
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an extended period of time self absorbed in deep introspection usually are
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far less carefree than those others that are constantly 'distracted' via
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social interaction. The slightly humorous part, its almost as if we need
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social interaction to keep ourselves safe from our own mind. I realize that
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I'm generalizing things slightly when I say this, but nonetheless mental
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instability is something inflicted upon us by ourselves, deep introspection,
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totally self absorption in our own world created by our own mind. Of course
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chemical imbalances or environmental circumstances all play a role in the
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cause of mental sickness, however mental sickness' battlefield is carried
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out in what is the essence of our individuality, our thoughts. Nothing
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ground breaking in this, just more of a general observation and its irony.
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It almost seems as if our mind is not the controlling mechanism of our
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existence, its almost as if this mass that we call the brain is an entity on
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its own and not our human defining entity. Almost as if it has its own
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agenda, our conscious thoughts occupy a small portion, something really
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insignificant and with minimal control. Reason I say this is as follows. As
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we all know, soldiers can become shell shocked after seeing all that
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destruction, death and other sickening actions, which the mind deals with by
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a variety of means. However, all these means are not something that we can
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consciously define, or say that we consciously trained ourselves to follow.
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All of these defense mechanisms were the result of subconscious changes,
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almost as if there is that other part of our brain that controls us, that
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does anything necessary to sustain its own existance. Reason I say its own
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existence is because invariably these changes alienate use as humans from
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the rest of society... which obviously isn't something that any sane
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individual would want. Selfish little thing isn't it?
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So I guess all those 'shallow' individuals that are so carefree
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are the ones who are the most sane? I don't know, it might be true. One
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thing that all deep thinkers like to believe is that in someway we are
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'deeper', we have more substance, our personality is defined more by our
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actions rather than our appearance. I can't argue with that, but is that
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really something to pursue? If I had a choice I can't say that I would
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really want to be in the present situation that I am. I think that I would
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prefer to be one of the carefree and shallow.. after all what's the point of
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living if the only memories one will have is of those lonesome days and
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nights with oneself and one's thoughts. The quality of one's life is defined
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largely by the memories, material wealth plays a very small part in the
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grand scheme of happiness. Memorable moments rarely if every center around
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moments of seclusion, not to say one can't only have memories of seclusion.
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The urge to criticize 'shallow' individuals is rooted a jealousy most of the
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Time. I say this because I'm aware of myself being guilty of this. I think I
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could have so much to say, some much to discuss with people.. however I also
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lack the ability to communicate on the level of the 'shallow', to make
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inane conversation. Once again this is not a criticism of the 'shallow'
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people, just a description of what our present society considers of that
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sort of conversation.
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In the end maybe we should all force ourselves to get out, to mix with as
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many people as possible. Don't just get drawn towards those people like
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oneself, its good to know people similar to oneself, but what's the point of
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mulling over the same stuff again and again. I for one am tired of always
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talking about the way things are, and the way to resolve them... I think all
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people of reasonably mental stability are aware of how to resolve their
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situation, they just do not have the desire to do it... or fear it too much.
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Inner^Kry - 15/May/99
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